House of Shock Resurrection

I happened to get invited to the resurrected House of Shock by a cousin of mine. Her husband bought tickets yet she’s terrified of “haunted houses” and has admitted that she got kicked out of one for being prone to violence, so she happily handed me her ticket. As we were standing in line (note: if you plan to visit next year but hate standing in line, buy the VIP pass) the crowd was treated with a freakshow. There was the drill up the nose act along with various suspension from hooks in the acts.

12189085_1728248027405021_40292243676227718_nWe got divided into separate lines before entering the House of Shock, and it’s nice if there are screamers in your group as that provides more entertainment. Before entering, no cameras are allowed inside and they have plenty of staff throughout the place to make sure no one’s on their phone. Once inside the clown’s mouth (the entrance way) there was a rather mild version of a haunted house with mutilated dummies and some actors in place. My favorite part is where you’re handed these vision glasses. One of the staff there told us whenever we walk throw the spinning tunnel to try not to hold onto the railing. The tunnel is spinning but the walkway is stationary. I managed to take a couple steps before ending up against the railing and from that point on I had trouble staying off it. After you make it out of the tunnel, you’re treated to the trippiest shit in the entire place. The way the walls were painted created this 3D effect and the way the clowns had painted their faces, it looked like their face was floating away from their head. It was during this part of the house that we encountered some women in our group were terrified of clowns. Damn did they scream good. After the psychedelic trip there’s another version of a typical haunted house followed by a walk in a small town where the vampires come out to play. There’s also a section of a morgue, sewer, asylum, and we even got to go to the depths of hell.

12065892_1729294017300422_2768516630804740441_nAfter the haunted house attraction was over, me and BJ made our way to the stage to where Suplecs were playing. Once their set was over and the House of Shock restarted for their 10’oclock show, Goatwhore took the stage. At one point early in their set, someone grabbed a trash can and threw it. Not long after that there was a fight in the pit that had to be broken up. After that the show went along smoothly until some drunk ass bitch got right next to me and started hollering about how much she wanted to fuck Sammy and Ben, and I just wanted to take my elbow right to her face.

When the show was finally over, me and BJ made a vow to go back next year. …and I definitely got ideas on how I want to decorate my house now.

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