The Church Of Bey: Religion Or Ruse?

I wasn’t planning on writing another one of these so soon, but now I have to. You see, I was awake last night with roiling anger until about two in the morning due to something I’d found harmlessly posted on my Facebook news feed. Apparently, there’s a church dedicated to the singer and wife of rapper Jay-Z, Beyonce Knowles. Yes, you heard me. The rest of the internet can’t believe it either. I thought it was a practical joke, an omega troll of the highest order – but it really does appear that a human being by the name of Pauline John Andrews has created a sort of religion known as Beyism. Later, it was written in TheNewsNerd that some 23 year old sacrificed herself, but I find that hard to believe now seeing as it doesn’t pop up anywhere else on the internet and is filled with what appears to be a section of comedy regarding the incident. It almost seems like an Onion piece, yet there’s still a following for this ridiculous Church of Bey. The church have even began to print Beybles, which seem to be a ridiculously interesting troll attempt at the Holy Bible itself.

Upon looking at the Tumblr accounts associated with this piece, it’s very possible that the whole thing started from 4chan. Everything does start from 4chan, but that’s beside the point. There could also be some Reddit trolls, but that’s also BESIDE THE POINT. This obviously seems to be a little too ridiculous to believe, yet some are out there already seeing it as idolism. If this church is indeed a church like the church of Scientology and Satan which are both religious organizations in the United States Of America, then that should bode ill for humanity. I don’t believe that any human being should be put that high on a pedestal and I actually got so fired up about it that I did write a song addressing the subject entitled, “Dethroning The Gilded Whore.” The song refers to really any pop singer of the type, like Beyonce, Rhianna, Madonna, Miley Cyrus, Katy Perry or any other female singer (or even male singer as whore is a unisex word) who puts out a godlike image and demands worship. But is this some sort of stunt to show that people are addicted to these larger than life stars? Is it to show that human beings put more faith in pop idols than they do in a higher power?

Beyble - Church of Bey

Time will tell as to whether or not this is a real religious institution or just a passing internet fad like the roundhouse kick of Chuck Norris, or the double rainbow madness of years later. The internet has been so memed that it’s almost impossible to tell what the latest trend is. And to be honest, I really don’t give one ounce of a fuck. But supposing it was a real religion, what would be next? Would Madonna have a church erected in her image? What about Katy Perry? Or did you not catch all the “holier than thou, supreme goddess” symbolism in that wretched “Dark Horse” video. Miley Cyrus would soon come next, as it would almost seem at that point that the sneaky elites wish to give us gods to worship – gods in flesh. Some already do bow down to them at some level, waxing about having their children and such – you do realize that this is how people thought of the gods in ancient times, correct? Except that these Gods don’t live high on Olympus. They live right here on Earth, in a foul little hovel known as Hollywood. I was talking to a guy earlier who told me that he wouldn’t mind filling Katy Perry with his semen, because she’s so damn beautiful. But why wouldn’t she be? With all the makeup, plastic surgery and other assorted tricks; the powers that be seek to make her as attractive as humanly possible. It almost seems like they’re following some rule based on the whore of Babylon. While increasing the amount of hormones that flow through our bodies to begin with, making us even dumber to our lusts. So chemically and visually, we’re falling head over heels in love with these new gods that you can see and touch. Or at least, you think you can. And they do dress in the most lavish of attire, looking better than 98% percent of the peasants who watch them from afar. One strand of that dress might very well pay for your house, let alone one tiny diamond on that necklace. So surely, they dress in the manner and fashion of Gods. I do remember the Aztecs would dress their sacrifices just as lavishly before killing them. Before sacrificing them – which to some extent might just happen as well.

I’m not quite sure so much on Bill’s stance towards these things, but I would like to address them musically because they mean quite a bit to me. Additionally, I’m also employing the talents of Scream Machine front woman SinDelle De Morte to help with some vocal sections of the disc, mainly some intro pieces. Yet I’m getting ahead of myself here, because Elabyrnth still sits unfinished and I’m not just going to lay it on the backburner. But it is obvious that Bill and I want to write and work on new material (the songs on Elabyrnth aren’t all completely new) so I think that this untitled EP will certainly set the stage for the third disc, which I’m tentatively titling The World Forfeit. Additionally, this will be the last Upfront Ramblings for a while, as I really need to get to work on all things Torii and get our crushing new album out to you before summer.


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